When Love isn't Enough: part 1

Yesterday was one of those days, where I found myself spending a few mins. with some friends on the last day of school. We were all sitting and talking about our plans for Spring break. The Idea was just not to be at home. So I asked one of my coolest friends (lets call her U.) what she had planned and she was like “O I don’t even know anymore”. Weird coming from her, this was the girl who was SUPER Juiced cuz her BF was coming home from school for the break. So being the nosy person I was I pushed and pushed until she finally told us.
Turns out that her BF is sick ( so I’m thinking: and?? Just take the boy some pepe soup and make some “face time”) But as she went on to explain what type of sickness he had, I just felt sad.
When U first started dating her boo, her cousin was like “you know he has sickle cell right?” But U didn’t think much of it, and she was like “soooo….what does that have to do with anything?” Though I don’t know the timeline of when things were said I have to go on an educated guess starting from now. So U’s BF finally told her that he has sickle cell disease. ( I already knew that people who have sickle cell tend to be in a lot of pain: one of my friends father had it…he was sick like almost every month). U also learned that her boyfriend wanted to have kids. It was and still is very much at the top of his list. Because he has the actual disease, the chances of him having a healthy child is almost slim. That’s where the woman plays a critical role. The chances of him having a healthy child with a woman who doesn’t have the disease is 3 out of 4. (Pretty darned good chance if you ask me). According to him: he can’t marry a woman who either has the disease or has the trait if he want kids.
U went on to tell us that she recently went to the doctor for a check up and some blood work ( This is the part where I got that horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach). Turns out she has the trait. ( why oh why??????)
She called up her BF. ( they always take a day out to just talk about any and everything). So she asks him to tell her more about his disease…and he does. He doesn’t want any of the kids he’ll have in the future to have to go through the pain that he goes through. ( This is the part where I urge you all to run to the search engines and type in sickle cell disease/anemia).
Now at this point some readers may be like well….what’s the problem. U is a carrier of the gene, and her BF has the disease. Their chances of having any HEALTHY kids together is very slim. Here you have two people who are very much in love. Both are from the same ethnic group in Naija, so you’d think there are no problems…right?? Wrong. I told U that she can always do more research on the disease to find out more, and see if anything can be done..after all they’re still young. Then I said well to be honest, If you love him very much, and run out of options…there’s always adoption. Then she gave me that look. ( I can’t blame her) ( most naijas/africans in general don’t do adoption unless they are barren and this is not a case of infertility) she went on to say well even if I do adopt, what will my family think and that she is right. She also stressed that she wants to know “ what he and I will look like together” ( after that statement my heart broke even more)Most families don’t take too kindly to bringing an outsider into the family, especially a child who is not of blood relation to come and bear the family name.
So when I think about this whole thing, it just makes me sad all over again. Here I thought love was supposed to conquer all. I mean who doesn’t want off springs? Most of us do, but at what price? Are we willing to give up perhaps the only person who will ever love us whole heartedly for something else of equal importance? So my heart goes out to U and her BF. I hope you both find a way to stay together…even though one person may not get what they want. I’m praying for you guys, and I urge you to have faith, because as Ayo said yesterday “ there is nothing prayer can’t do”.


There is nothing else i can do but to dedicate this song, to a very sweet and caring girl. One who i know will love a person with all her heart and leave out nothing. One that I'm afraid will evetually end up sacrifising her own happiness for that of another person. So here is "Feel My Love" by Adele.

Na juju??

This morning I woke up at my usual time; 5:30 am, to get ready for Saturday class. Come time to leave I couldn't find my metro card. Not just any regular metro card. A transit check; this allows me to ride the bus/train unlimited for a while year. So now i was frustrated and asked my youngest sis if she had seen it. turns out my parents found it on the floor and when i questioned them, they had no idea what they did with it...arrrgh. so my father thought he might've put it in the garbage. yours truly had to don some gloves and sift through garbage looking for it. Couldn't find it there, so instead i took money from my dad for transportation. i went to open the front door to leave, and turns out i was locked inside. Never mind that the door wasn't actually locked. a screw had come undone, and lodged into the bolt hole. trapping me and my family inside. so once again i called daddy to the rescue.... and even he couldn't open it!!...by now it was 8:00 and my class starts at 9. ( its takes me approx 45 mins to get to school...an hour on a bad day...like this) so after hammering, and sliding a knife through the lock part of the door, nothing happened. Then my mother got the brilliant idea of me climbing through the window. i was flabbergasted. but then i ended up doing it. With the help of my father, i climbed on top of our PC to reach the window...nearly ripping my pants in the process. finally got my foot onto the jeep and hopped down. I ran to the bus stop (I never knew i had this much speed in me). by the time i got to the train station to buy a new metro card its was 8:24. The next bus didn't come until 8:40. Imagine the look on peoples faces when i walked into lecture late. me that's always there before the professor and everyone else self....but on the bright side today was the last Saturday class...next week is spring break!!!! but how am i supposed to leave the house without my transit check now????

The girl who broke her mother's comb

Ahhh. Its good to be back. I love the sound of my fingers racing across the keyboard...click click clock clock...lol. So this week was more than productive for me. Slowly approaching spring break, so i cant complain much. Five more days to go, and freedom is mine!!

I have a confession to make. I haven't been totally honest with myself or others. This has been going on since January. This issue has become damaging. I can't hold it in anymore.
I'm in dire need of a PERM!!!.
Who was I fooling thinking I could go natural?? 3 months without that creamy white crack known as relaxer.....the only thing that can manage this my tumble weed I call hair. Last time i got my hair relaxed was Dec 08'. Can you imagine? After that perm, i though well since they say going natural is good, why not give it a try? So me and my mumu self, abandoned my hair for sooo long. Combing it is now difficult. Infact there are some days I don't even put the comb to it. I just take one head scarf and wrap it around. When my Friends ask I tell them I'm fasting!! lol.
But after a while I realized that laziness kept me from getting my hair done. Now everyone is complaining, from my father to my mother, to my friends. as if to say that its a national crisis. I keep telling them I'm a college student abeg! i have no time for such frivolities. It's not like I'm looking for a husband. And if i was, what happened to "take me as I am".
According to my mom, "no man wants a woman who looks like onye ara ( crazy person)"
see insult oooo. She's only on my case because I broke her favorite wide teethed comb. Now she curses my hair every chance she gets. So I've decided to give in and finally get my hair done. No no perm...not right away...I'm thinking kinky twist first. Never had it done before but I've always loved the "natural" look of it....

Don't talk to me

How do you tell the people you chill with that the newest addition to the group is a fake-O.

Dear readers,
I'm currently dealing with an emotional vampire right now. You know the type. People who don't give a rat's ass about others. They suck the energy from people and give nothing back. then when you try to sublty let them know that you don't appreciate their behavior they suddenly catch the DRAMA QUEEN SYNDROME.
Now don't get me wrong, i have no real problem with this person. its just that They're so vulgar, loud, rude and obnoxious. Now i dont normally get into the habit of telling people how to behave in public, but OMG this person drove me mad!! the worst part is I have yet to let my other friends know how i feel. For one, they always tell me how wonderful this person is, and how cool, and how funny they are.I'm sorry but when did it become funny to make fun of an indian person just because they were muslim. Especially when one of the people that was with us is muslim. SMH.
now i'm at my boiling, because for me to sit here all day and rant is just not my kind of thing to do. lets just say i'm fed up with this person and their behavior. up to the point that if he/she is with my friends i just walk away. Its like he/she put some kind of curse on them, that makes them fall for his/her foolishness. i mean i love my friends and all, but until this person came into the picture, i've been seeing them in a whole new light...like why do you fall so easily for this bufoonery? sigh** it makes no sense at all..

Anyways that all for today: Back to my Anatomy and Physiology!! test on monday. wish me luck

Play your luck @ love

Yesterday was Casino day @ QCC. Don't ask me what types of games there were, all I know was that there were cards, chips tables, and people with Chips in hand. Some winning, and some losing. I didn't know how to play anything, so I gave up my "cash" to someone. With the type of headache I had, i was forced to sit and read my romance novel, that I had just checked out from the library. Halee, sonia, and Ade ventured back and forth from the games to me, for which i was grateful or else I would've fallen asleep.

Watching them I realized that something fishy was going on. The guy that originally like Halee, was talking to Ade. Then it hit me: this isn't the first time they had the same guy vieing for both their affection. There's the computer guy ( whose name shall remain unknown to you the reader) who in the beginning liked Ade ( before she even met halee) Then he started talking to Halee. What do both guys have in common? They're both Jamaican, as are all the guys in that school who've bee trying to talk to me, Uwa, Halee and Ade. Me on the other hand, I learned quickly that guys of any background can be players. My bullshit detector goes off at an alarming rate every time "nonsense chin gum chewing boys" try to spit game. I think its all a conspiracy. Its like they're tryna get with all the Nigerian girls, let alone the fact that we're all like sisters, and hang out together, so its not like they ( dudes) don't know what they're doing.

Then there's the "other" who for some reason loves giving me mixed signals. If i was remotely interested I'd be alarmed, but at this rate I'm only disgusted cuz I definitely am not feeling him, and he has the nerve to try and talk to another one of my friends at the same time. Ugh! And people wonder why I have a low tolerance for guys ( who aren't my close friends or besties). They all come with the same sorry excuses and the same pathetic lines.

Grow Up!

Long day today. Finally got on the bus, trying to make myself comfortable in a seat that was designed to torment my back..errr. A woman who looked like she was in her early 40s got on the bus. Sat all the way in the front...proceeded to take out something from her pcoket. Lo and behold its a {dun dun dun!!} SIDEKICK. I was so appalled its not even funny. One of my biggest pet peeves being played out right in my face. That woman had GHETTO written all over her. I don't understand what it is with grown ass adults playing with kid stuff. It bothers me, to see a grown person who looks like they could be my father, mother, aunt, or uncle with a sidekick in their hand. It's like they don't realize that they are OLD. Everyone knows sidekicks are only good for one thing...texting and AIM. thats it. Nothing else nothing more. I mean who the hell are these people texting? shouldn't they be busy looking after their kids, or rather calling home to see if everything is good on the homefront? After that "mama" ( which i secretly dubbed her in my head) calls someone and was like " well are you on Myspace? Oh word you in her top? well so am. Add me then". Like seriously, grow up and stop the madness please.

Day 1

Of my abstinence from facebook. My internet lover. It's been a whole. I miss your pokes, inbox messages, your notifications, and pics....The little things you do...like the chat feature. So far I'm proud of myself. I can do this! right? right?!! yes i can do this...even though I'm currently suffering from withdrawal symptoms. the shaking, quivering, trembling and itch to sign back on. I promised myself that I could hold out until after easter...but thats far away....



So today I found myself in bed after everyone had left...half asleep and half awake, waiting for God knows what ( actually I know what I was waiting for...just dont wanna say it right now :P)
Ended up at the library..cuz mom kicked me out of the house (sigh*) woe is me. went to York, met up with BoDa ( LMAOOO: inny) and proceded onto Bebe's casa, where we spent the rest of the evening listening to songs, dancing, and catching up. It must be repeated..only this time i need a camera to capture the fun...def got the crazies.