Don't talk to me

How do you tell the people you chill with that the newest addition to the group is a fake-O.

Dear readers,
I'm currently dealing with an emotional vampire right now. You know the type. People who don't give a rat's ass about others. They suck the energy from people and give nothing back. then when you try to sublty let them know that you don't appreciate their behavior they suddenly catch the DRAMA QUEEN SYNDROME.
Now don't get me wrong, i have no real problem with this person. its just that They're so vulgar, loud, rude and obnoxious. Now i dont normally get into the habit of telling people how to behave in public, but OMG this person drove me mad!! the worst part is I have yet to let my other friends know how i feel. For one, they always tell me how wonderful this person is, and how cool, and how funny they are.I'm sorry but when did it become funny to make fun of an indian person just because they were muslim. Especially when one of the people that was with us is muslim. SMH.
now i'm at my boiling, because for me to sit here all day and rant is just not my kind of thing to do. lets just say i'm fed up with this person and their behavior. up to the point that if he/she is with my friends i just walk away. Its like he/she put some kind of curse on them, that makes them fall for his/her foolishness. i mean i love my friends and all, but until this person came into the picture, i've been seeing them in a whole new light...like why do you fall so easily for this bufoonery? sigh** it makes no sense at all..

Anyways that all for today: Back to my Anatomy and Physiology!! test on monday. wish me luck

Play your luck @ love

Yesterday was Casino day @ QCC. Don't ask me what types of games there were, all I know was that there were cards, chips tables, and people with Chips in hand. Some winning, and some losing. I didn't know how to play anything, so I gave up my "cash" to someone. With the type of headache I had, i was forced to sit and read my romance novel, that I had just checked out from the library. Halee, sonia, and Ade ventured back and forth from the games to me, for which i was grateful or else I would've fallen asleep.

Watching them I realized that something fishy was going on. The guy that originally like Halee, was talking to Ade. Then it hit me: this isn't the first time they had the same guy vieing for both their affection. There's the computer guy ( whose name shall remain unknown to you the reader) who in the beginning liked Ade ( before she even met halee) Then he started talking to Halee. What do both guys have in common? They're both Jamaican, as are all the guys in that school who've bee trying to talk to me, Uwa, Halee and Ade. Me on the other hand, I learned quickly that guys of any background can be players. My bullshit detector goes off at an alarming rate every time "nonsense chin gum chewing boys" try to spit game. I think its all a conspiracy. Its like they're tryna get with all the Nigerian girls, let alone the fact that we're all like sisters, and hang out together, so its not like they ( dudes) don't know what they're doing.

Then there's the "other" who for some reason loves giving me mixed signals. If i was remotely interested I'd be alarmed, but at this rate I'm only disgusted cuz I definitely am not feeling him, and he has the nerve to try and talk to another one of my friends at the same time. Ugh! And people wonder why I have a low tolerance for guys ( who aren't my close friends or besties). They all come with the same sorry excuses and the same pathetic lines.

Grow Up!

Long day today. Finally got on the bus, trying to make myself comfortable in a seat that was designed to torment my back..errr. A woman who looked like she was in her early 40s got on the bus. Sat all the way in the front...proceeded to take out something from her pcoket. Lo and behold its a {dun dun dun!!} SIDEKICK. I was so appalled its not even funny. One of my biggest pet peeves being played out right in my face. That woman had GHETTO written all over her. I don't understand what it is with grown ass adults playing with kid stuff. It bothers me, to see a grown person who looks like they could be my father, mother, aunt, or uncle with a sidekick in their hand. It's like they don't realize that they are OLD. Everyone knows sidekicks are only good for one thing...texting and AIM. thats it. Nothing else nothing more. I mean who the hell are these people texting? shouldn't they be busy looking after their kids, or rather calling home to see if everything is good on the homefront? After that "mama" ( which i secretly dubbed her in my head) calls someone and was like " well are you on Myspace? Oh word you in her top? well so am. Add me then". Like seriously, grow up and stop the madness please.

Day 1

Of my abstinence from facebook. My internet lover. It's been a whole. I miss your pokes, inbox messages, your notifications, and pics....The little things you do...like the chat feature. So far I'm proud of myself. I can do this! right? right?!! yes i can do this...even though I'm currently suffering from withdrawal symptoms. the shaking, quivering, trembling and itch to sign back on. I promised myself that I could hold out until after easter...but thats far away....



So today I found myself in bed after everyone had left...half asleep and half awake, waiting for God knows what ( actually I know what I was waiting for...just dont wanna say it right now :P)
Ended up at the library..cuz mom kicked me out of the house (sigh*) woe is me. went to York, met up with BoDa ( LMAOOO: inny) and proceded onto Bebe's casa, where we spent the rest of the evening listening to songs, dancing, and catching up. It must be repeated..only this time i need a camera to capture the fun...def got the crazies.

And you say my name...

So today I decided to deactivate my facebook account. Don't ask me why, its something that I felt I had to do for the time being. I need to feel like my life doesn't revolve around it. I guess I'm trying to make up for the times I've signed off only to find myself logged back on two secs later. Things like that can kill brain cells. Forgive my fragmented thoughts.

And so it hit me while talking to my neighbor a couple of days ago. The Naija community in NY is too small for my liking. Which is why i don't make it a habit of attending naija parties. The way I see it you're partying with the same people over and over again<< where's the fun in that? So I'll probably wait for time to pass before i finally make my debut at one of the parties ( the little form fitting dresses in my closet are begging for a night out in town). Another unfrotunate aspect of it is that , in NY, if you know one Nigerian you know them all. So lets say you know Kunle, whose cousin is Ola..turns out Ola was the dude your cousin dated a while back, but now he's dating chioma who happens to be one of your close friends from way back when. Now you like Kunle's friend Emeka, but Chioma doesn't trust him cuz they used to chill and he's not bf material<< Things like this i don't like. I think thats one of the reasons why I've never really bothered dating a naija guy. If there is no cheating involved, you better believe you're messing with someone's ex, and there's bound to be drama. So as of right now...I'm trying to keep a low profile ( right bebe? LMAO). Don't get me wrong I love naija guys. I love everything about them, from their swagg to their sense of humor, but getting involved with one in NYC is like a warrant for trouble.

tests, tests, and more tests

sigh* study study study, eat eat eat...
The above is my life as of right now. can't complain since my grades are looking extra sexy :).
can't wait till spring break...the countdown begins NOW!
Two more tests and I can taste FREEDOM!

sick day...

So i was extremely sick...borederline violent. That time of month came subtly ( if your disgusted, go away). The nausea hit me first, then the dizziness. All day I couldn't lay down and get some proper sleep. The cramps were just that bad. On top of that lil bro decided to have playtime galore and jump on me. Felt crummy through out. My hair at the moment look like a cross between Don King and wolverine :(. On top of that I have a 4 hour spanish class tomorrow morning, and a test to boot. There's also another test on monday...Anatomy Lab...adios mio.

So far I can't seem to keep food or medicine down. I've thrown up like 7 x in the past 10 hours or so. I feel utterly weak, and dehydrated. Unfortunately i have to cancel all my weekend plans. I simply wont be able to make it anywhere on my own two feet. My tummy looks flat...as though I've been getting ready for summer all winter long. (so thats how anorexics and bulimics do it . YUCKY).

awakened

I know that God works in mysterious ways. Sometimes I just wonder...Though I dont question his plans for me. I know in the end its all for a good reason. His Love shall manifest in me. So as of recent, I had a heartbreak in one aspect of my life, but when i analyzed it, it wasn't really heart break. It was an awakening of something better to come.

What was that?

LMAOOOO. ok first of...lets just say this is probably the most awkward and funny thing that has ever happened to you. What was that? Are you that bad of a socialist that, the whole thing went that way? You see this is what happens when meeting someone for the very first time. You play out the scenario in your head...everything is perfect, you enjoy one another's company...everything goes smoothly..and you end up meeting again.
well Lets just say this wasn't one of those meetings. In retrospect you just have to laugh, cuz at this point that all you can do. Either that or cry about it..lol. and everybody knows big girls don't cry. I mean don't you just hate it when people depend on you begin the conversation. After they see that its not gonna happen like that, they seem to lose interest. You see them getting restless..(usually the drumming on the table gives away the anxiety to leave). You try another location only to find that this one was worse than the last. There nothing else left ot do or say...and they finally walk away.
I say fine. The ball is no longer in your court. So as for now you are no longer in the game. Don't be concerned. You've done your part...and sometimes its not enough, for others. But is should always be enough for you

Not scared of Lions and Tigers and Bears

If she knew anything about him, it was that...when it suited him he could be intransigent. He hadn't listened to her explanation, but was so immersed in his disapointment that he couldn't see the logic in her explanation...." I said I was sorry and I am..." Without realizing that she would do so she whirled around and walked out...
Three days later, she still couldn't forget...she needed some type of closure. Something that would help her sleep easy at night. Some thing to reassure her that his heart truly was cold, so that when she walked away she'd never have to look back...She had to make that phone call...but her pride was killing her...a heart wrenching sadness, that only brought tears. Nothing else left to do now, but to make that phone call...time. I need time.

Try again

Remember when you were younger...a week shy of being 11 years old, and you discovered the power of prayer? Not that kind of "ok I'll pray once in a month,and forget about it kind of prayer". i'm talking about that "every night before you went to bed, its the last thought on your mind, and you just had to beg God for this type of prayer."
It was those skates. the one you saw on TV, and fell in love with, and you just had to have. The one where all the kids who put it on seemed like they could just glide through life. The smile on their faces, tugging at your heart strings cuz... well cuz..you wanted a smile like that too. So you prayed with heart. You begged and pleaded and made a deal with God..telling him that if he could grant you this you'll be the best, daughter, student, and sister there ever was. You prayed every night for approx seven months. Seven long hard months, whose passing days just dulled your spirit a bit, because those skates were never gonna be a reality. remember that?
then remember the day mom took you and your little sisters to toys r' us, and she bought you those magical skates. the pink and creamy white ones, with the strap on lace up fronts? my my my...you were the envy of the neighborhood. Even your sisters wanted to put their feet it, but you kept telling them that their feet were too big, and that the skates were custom made for your foot...you thought you were cinderella. remember the first time you tried to skate, only to learn that you had to practice skating, and that it wasn't as easy as it looked. you fell, over and over again, but that didn't stop you. Day in and day out you were outside again. little feet in skates against the pavements....Remember how all of this happened approx 10 yrs ago...and it all started with prayer...well I'm gonna need you to pray again. pray with your heart once more.

and yesterday

A huge snow storm/blizzard decided to hit NY. Piled up to more than 10 inches. Decided to shovel the snow with my lil sis. We ended up having a snow fight. Nothing is more chilling than having snow stuffed down your jacket. So we finished shoveling only to find that the blizzard was ongoing. There was absolutely nothing to do all day yesterday, except watch movies, stay on AIM, listen to music, sleep, read, or referee the WWIII between my siblings. I hate feeling trapped in the house. These are things I can do and enjoy on a regular day, when the weather does not dictate my every move. On top of that My anemia decided to act up. No matter how high the heat was turned up, I couldn't get rid of the chill that went bone deep. I started feeling dizzy. To make matter worse my brother's babysitter couldn't get her car out of the snow, so i was stuck playing mommy all day long. ( I knew I shouldn't have been skipping all my iron tablets). Def. was not in the mood for anyone. Tried baking a whole chicken and cooking soup, to help my mood, but not even that worked. NOTHING worked. Tried calling Bebe...she didn't answer, so i fell asleep...didn't wake up until this morning...feeling a little better...but lets see how the day progresses..sigh*